I have never been much of a political junkie. While issues and leaders are important and I always vote when I’m not mid-move, the gossip, the bribery, the mud-slinging, the overt sexism, the shout-downs, the paparazzi, and the culty propaganda have all been major turn-offs. I try to read up on the issues when I can, but not follow any race or issue with too much expectation.

It was with some surprise, therefore, that I woke up in the very early hours of November 6, 2024, to realize that my heart was pounding and I seemed to be in the throes of a full-blown flight-response.

Get up, Get out, Get away… my Body was saying, Get up, get out, get away. But where? Where do I go? Australia, maybe. Japan. Brazil. Ireland. Anywhere. Get up, get out, get away.

Recognizing a trigger-reaction, I began belly breathing, bringing my hand low on the belly to help me anchor in to a deep, deep breath. Instead of answering the urgent impulse to flee, I held my body and witnessed the waves of feeling as they crashed.

Get up, get out, get away. Get up, get out, get away. Get up, get out, get away.

I didn’t argue. I didn’t use reason to try and suppress the feeling. I watched the thoughts and calculations about visas and underground railroads drift by like anxious clouds. I breathed. And, as I watched, the thoughts, the heartbeats, the panic slowed down. Pauses in the internal monologue opened up. They were just long enough for me to ask some questions.

What is this that I’m feeling?

Fear. Anxiety. Panic. Hopelessness. Not again.

Why am I feeling this?

I don’t want a man like this to be in charge of so much power. I don’t want to be in an international conflict. I don’t want to live in a country run by this person. I don’t want my kids to be in danger at school. I don’t want him to be making decisions about my or my daughters’ health. I want my Queer friends and family members to be safe…*

What would this feeling like me to do?

Run. Escape. Keep moving. Don’t get stuck. Don’t stop until you are safe.

Then, my bedroom door opened and my little son came in to curl up with me for some middle-of-the-night comfort and my own trigger subsided to make room for wrapping my boy’s little body in a warm, securing hug. I went back to sleep.

In the morning, though, the flight-response was back and this time, it brought its friends, fight and freeze. The mental chatter was thick as San Francisco fog.

Get out, get away, run! Or else turn around and get loud. Protect what you love! Do it now, do it before it’s too late! But it won’t matter. Nothing will matter. I am so small and this is so big. And where would we go, anyway? What would I say? Everyone is in crisis. Better to stay, lie low, hold still. Hide. Don’t draw attention to yourself.

Since I am a 21st century person and hadn’t had very much sleep and I was in mom-mode getting kids ready for school, I did not put a bunch of well-thought out embodiment tools to work. I reached for my phone for distraction. I didn’t have an endless hole of social media to drown in, but maybe the bright screen of diversion would have something else for me to think about.

Fortunately, I was not allowed a distraction. I was given, instead, a series of messages from various friends, all of whom were processing in their own ways.

As fellow embodiment coach, Shea said, “I woke up feeling disbelief and powerlessness. My body froze. It wasn’t until a friend sent me a message saying that she loved me and that she was here for me. That’s when the tears fell. And I felt ALL of the grief and that I’d bee holding flow out of me like a wave.”

Another magical embodiment friend, Kristen, said it like this: “Rage. Fear. Sadness. Rage again. One moment…my heart is pounding, I’m breathing quickly and I have a strong urge to punch a wall and scream. Another…there is a heaviness in my body, an impulse to close my eyes and lie in bed and weep.”

And from another anonymous friend: “Really big feelings right now. It’s just…heavy…”

In the mirror of these words, I recognized my own physical cycle, too: oscillating from ravenous to nauseated, from jumpy to flatlined, from restless to fatigued.

How extraordinary, I thought, that our bodies could all be so far apart and yet be dancing through the same spirals of feeling.

This became a catalyst, for me. I realized that the pain that blossoms in the wake of a collective event, such as an election, can be a potent opportunity for collective healing, just as a individual trigger can offer up the invaluable opportunity for one person to transmute a past pain into balance for the future. I started with my own body, because that is the only instrument I have to play. And I began feeling my way back to regulation. I humbly share these options with you, in hopes that someone else in the thick fog of their own triggers, will have a chance to regulate, as well.

How to Come Down from a Trigger:

1. Slow Down

When dealing with intense, non-rational somatic triggers, it is important not to charge in with attempts to “fix” things or “take control” of the situation. This step can be challenging, especially if you find the trigger engulfing you in a public setting. We don’t have very many social scripts for assisting or even understanding strangers or colleagues in a triggered-response.

Regardless of where you experience your trigger, though, the most helpful and impactful thing you can do for yourself is to

slow down…

Maybe this means excusing yourself to a bathroom stall or a stairwell or an empty conference room. Maybe it means locking your bedroom door and lying down. Maybe it means closing your eyes, turning away from your desk and sitting very still. (If you are in a fight or flight response, this might be very difficult, but remember this is only the first step. We’ll work on processing the trigger later.)

2. Name Your Trigger

Most of us are familiar with the fight-flight-freeze trinity. You might also notice the younger siblings to these: fawn and fake. Here is how to recognize which kind of trigger you’re experiencing and if you are experiencing a compound trigger.

Fight: thoughts about resisting, pushing back, rebellion, violence, domination, subjugation. If you are having any kind of war analogy come to mind, you’re in a fight-response. Physically, you might experience a desire to work out hard, to punch something, or you might feel very tense, like a coiled snake preparing to strike.

Flight: thoughts about running away, getting away, fleeing, leaving etc. Physically, this response is correlated with a desire to run (often, as fast as possible or for long periods), low appetite, and possibly frequent bladder emptying. You might also experience restless leg syndrome, feel the need to pace, have a hard time sitting or staying in one place, or fidget a lot.

Freeze: thoughts about hiding, about holding still, lying low, not wanting to be exposed or “stick your neck out.” Physically, you’ll find yourself holding your breath or having a hard time taking a deep breath. You may speak in a lower register than usual or feel the need to cross your arms tightly across yourself. You may also feel the urge to hide in a dark closet, bathroom stall, under the covers, or even in a corner to simulate some sense of safety. Imagine a fox crouching beneath the forest underbrush, waiting for a hunter to pass.

Fawn: thoughts about sucking up to the perceived threat–maybe you could appease them/it somehow with gifts, compliments, food, or subservience? Imagine a baby deer with liquid eyes, innocently needing protection. Physically, you may notice your shoulders caving in, while your hands come up in supplication-type poses. You may also notice a desire to sit down on the floor or do things to make yourself look smaller, more dependent, showing that you are vulnerable or not aggressive.

Fake: thoughts will gravitate around getting loud, being brazen and sarcastic, making bold commentary, and otherwise showing your strength. Think of a porcupine puffing up and brandishing its quills to scare off a predator. Physically, you will may feel provocative, daring, yet also cold and distant from those around you. In this response, you are not allowing others to see your real pain, fear, or insecurity–instead, you mask it with a front of overconfidence.

3. Surrender to the Wisdom of the Trigger (at least for a moment)

Here’s where we get a little adventurous. Instead of fighting the trigger or dismissing it with logical thoughts, allow yourself to sink in and listen. I find it most helpful to get out a journal and take dictation directly from the trigger. Treat every thought and feeling like they matter (because they do) and don’t worry if you repeat yourself. Some triggers need to say the same things over and over to feel heard.

When we welcome the trigger into our arms and provide a safe place for ourselves to experience our own reactions, we can allow the trigger to actually teach us more about ourselves and the situation we are in. (This is also where we open the door to resolving the trigger permanently, too.)

4. Choose a Safe Way to Act on Your Trigger

Each trigger has its own requests. Most of the time, we suppress these actions and pretend that we are fine–nothing is wrong, we’re totally normal and not bothered at all. Unfortunately, this only sends our fear, pain, shame, etc. back to the netherworld of our subconscious, where it waits for another chance to jump-scare us in our real world.

The blessing of being triggered by a collective event is that we receive an opportunity to witness our own hidden woundedness and when we are able to see that wound, we can begin to treat it. To do that, we must consciously choose some *safe* action that will communicate to our bodies that we recognize and validate the need to find safety in this way, without needing to treat another human or other living being as an enemy.

This list is not exhaustive or prescriptive. You can mix-and-match as desired. Resist however, the urge to shame your body into any action. If you’re experiencing a fawn reaction, for example, but feel like gushy self-care is embarrassing, you might be tempted to try to address your trigger in some other way. However, matching your action to your trigger is essential because it communicates in a non-verbal way that you have understood the distress signal that your body is sending. If you mismatch your treatment, the original trigger response will keep coming back until you treat it on its own terms.

If you are experiencing a compound trigger, you might need to take them one at a time and spend some time listening to each trigger, rather than addressing them all at once.

Safe actions for each Trigger:

Fight: Kickboxing, HIIT workouts, pushups, growling, listening or singing along to loud music.

Flight: Running, cardio exercise, listening to music with a consistent-beat or rhythmic drumming.

Freeze: Go to a private space, curl up in a ball, wrap yourself in a cozy blanket, turn down the lights, get quiet or listen to slow, soft meditation music.

Fawn: Treat yourself to something special, buy yourself flowers, find some self-care through external providers or through self-administration. You can pamper yourself with a bath, a massage, or just a nice private walk.

Fake: Write all your brilliant, witty comebacks in your journal. Be as messy as you like. Let yourself feel as you go. Remind yourself that no one needs to see any of this. Let yourself drop from super-confidence into super-vulnerability on the page and don’t explain yourself. If writing is not working for you, dress yourself to the nines and strut (in public or in private, whichever appeals).

5. Check in: How Do You Feel Now?

As much as possible, try not to rush your body through a trigger. Allow it to find its own conclusion. This might mean that you dress to the nines for a week straight and strut through your day like a Queen every single waking hour. On the other hand, you might find the conclusion of your trigger after only a few minutes of cocooning yourself in a comfy blanket.

When you feel like you’ve gotten to a point where you’re feeling a little bored with the chosen action, do a check in. Close your eyes and internally ask your body, “How are you feeling now?” Check in on the mental chatter–is it still streaming through like an endless ticker tape of anxiety or despair? If so, you may need to switch actions to match your current responses. If your mind feels still and calm, you have probably found your conclusion.

A note about tears: Crying is an important way that you body clears energy and releases tension. It is nonviolent, noninvasive, and it is a completely safe and free way for your body to process overwhelm. Unfortunately, crying is often disdained or ignored socially and sometimes it is even seen as a sign of weakness. If your body processes emotion through tears, but you don’t like crying in front of others, make sure to dedicate time to fully releasing your tears when you are by yourself. If a tear-inducing reaction does come on suddenly in public, try not to pin blame on your body for this response. Tend to yourself as you would tend to another treasured friend in a similar display of distress.

6. Ground Yourself

After giving yourself an opportunity to recognize your trigger and then respond to it in a safe way, it is important to invite this wounded part of yourself back into integration with the whole of you.

Grounding yourself could look like a brief moment of deep breathing or a long surrender into shavasana or meditation at the end of a hard workout. Whatever you choose to do, send gratitude deep into the tissues of your body for showing you this part of yourself and commit to responding with self-compassion the next time a trigger shows up.

Some other ideas for grounding:

• Sageing your space and/or your body
• Diffusing a favorite essential oil. “Woody” or “earthy” scents like Pine, Spruce, Cedarwood can be especially grounding.
• Pressing your feet down towards the ground
• Eating a very simple meal like plain oatmeal, plain rice, or plain bread with little olive oil and salt.
• Walking barefoot outside without any devices for 5+ minutes
• Spending some time in a float tank, acupuncture session, or other silent, therapeutic modality

7. Tend to the Natural World

Once the trigger has calmed down and you have taken an opportunity to ground yourself, it is important to bring yourself back into connection to the Natural World. When we are triggered, our bodies are reminding us forcefully, that we have fundamental needs: comfort, rest, food, shelter, attachment. Our body’s distress demands that we fill some or many of these needs as we seek to re-regulate.

Once regulation is found, though, many of us go back to our isolated, over-stimulated, nature-deprived lives, which only sets us up for future disruptions. To really heal a trigger, we must complete our process of re-regulation by finding ways to tend to the Natural World–something that connects us to our biological reality beyond our own skin. This connectedness is an essential part of remaining grounded and regulated long-term.

Some ideas for tending to the Natural World:

• Gardening, small or large, personal or community
• Tending to a potted plant (If you’re really nervous, try an easy on like Aloe Vera)
• Detour your route to or from work/school so that you can go for a nature walk before hand
• Go forest-bathing or hiking without using your phone, as much as possible
• Meditate on an images, animals, or environments that may have presented themselves during your healing process. Ask, “What else do you have to teach me?”
• Find a way to compost in your area
• Donate or volunteer for a local Natural Restoration or Conservation effort
• Research the names local flora or fauna and try to learn a few each week
• Pick a spot (a safe place that will not put you in the way of traffic or other dangers) that needs some clean up and spend an hour or two gently picking up the litter and sending love back to that area

8. Reintegrate Gently

As you go back to the expectations or demands of your life, allow yourself to be a little tender around the trigger point. You may find it necessary to draw some boundaries in your conversations or activities as your trigger continues to heal. You can say something like, “I’m not ready to talk about that at this point. Maybe we can check in again in a week or two.” Protect your trigger point as seriously as you would a child in distress because in all likelihood, the trigger comes from some insecurity gained in childhood.

As you go back to your normal day, keep going slowly. Tend to the edges of your day–making sure that you go to sleep on time and eat nutritious meals. And, keep some awareness open to your experience with the trigger. Often, there is more than one lesson to learn.

A note about creativity: Art, music, and other forms of creative expression can be powerful ways of processing thick tangles of emotion. You don’t have to be a trained professional to enjoy the creative process or to get fancy with the crayons. Claiming permission to create can be an empowering way to reintegrate, following a trigger. Try using the prompt “what does this feeling sound like?” for musical experimentation or “if this feeling had a color what would it be? If this feeling had a shape, what would it be?” for paper-and-media exploration.

Conclusion

As you find and treat your triggers, remember that your work is, at once, completely personal, and utterly universal. The exact circumstances or expressions of your triggers is unique to your trauma, but we are all dealing with triggers and unresolved traumas. This affects our homes, our friendships, our work environments, our spending habits, and of course, our politics.

Every effort we make to individually regulate our own triggers, is thus, a gift of healing we give back to our community, as well.

*Descriptions of my mental and bodily reactions to the USA’s 2024 Election are shared here for illustrative purposes only, not to incite concern or offer predictions.

For further help with trigger regulation, please consult a qualified professional. Depending on the nature and expression of your trauma, Feminine Embodiment Coaching could be a great fit. For questions or to see how it feels, you are warmly invited to book a complimentary Discovery Session.

“In this time that we’re living through now, and as we face ecological crisis and sociocultural uncertainty, we need more than ever to uncover stories of the land and the wisdom which is encoded within them.

They can help us to cultivate an understanding of the unity of things, a reverence for the interconnectedness of life, a belief in the power of the imagination and of the intuition.

They can help us to find a sense of deep, embodied belonging to this beautiful, animate Earth.”

Sharon Blackie